Peculiar contest concerns editors

By Editorial

News that Dooie Stevens is giving away a set of breast implants as a prize hit our editorial board this week like a tidal wave of milk. This may go without saying (given the tone of the preceding statement) but we didn’t all resort to the knee-jerk rallying cry of "Boycott Dooie Stevens." We’re much too academic for that. Instead, 12 Gauntlet editors took an hour to discuss what we thought of Dooie Stevens’ latest promotion, with emotions ranging from disgust to disinterest.

Some of us didn’t like the idea of a bar giving away breast implants on the grounds it’s tasteless. Indeed, while bars such as Cowboys are rumoured to offer certain surgical procedures to long-serving staff, it has never been publicly admitted. Dooie Stevens makes this leap into uncharted territory, acknowledging once and for all the heretofore unspoken connection between sex and the bar scene. The surprising part about our condemnation of Dooie Stevens as tacky is… well, they’ve always been tacky in most Calgarian’s minds. Should this latest move by Dooie’s really come as any surprise? Yes and no. If anyone is going to break records in the realm of tastelessness, it’s probably going to be them. But, wow–did they ever set the bar high. Will the Back Alley have to give away penile implants to stay competitive?

Another editor pointed out that Dooie Stevens has a right to promote itself this way. While it might be tacky, it’s not illegal to give away breast implants. They know tastelessness may have repercussions; they’ve staked their reputation on this contest, and you can boycott them if you want.

At least one of our editors complained about the idea of a bar giving away a surgical procedure as a prize. It’s not as though the bartender who fishes the lucky winner’s name out of the fishbowl is going to perform the surgery, but at the same time, what ethical questions are raised by the convergence of a bar and this type of medical procedure? Is this moral? Should a bar give away liver transplants? What if the breast enlargement surgery is botched? Can the bar be sued? It’s not like giving away a car–if you crash said prize it’s your fault for bad driving. In our minds, botched surgery constitutes bad administration of a prize. Did they really think this contest through?

Of course, there were concerns by others on our board about what this contest says about society’s views of women. If this contest proves popular, it only goes to reinforce the paternal notion that big breasts are superior to small breasts; that women should view breast enlargement as enhancement, that a "healthy rack" is advantageous to any woman seeking a mate. Again, hardly a surprising mindset from the owners of a bar. Dooie Stevens could give anything away as a prize. Does it have to be something that reinforces archaic societal stereotyping? Our guess is they probably made quite a deliberate decision to give away something that would get them a lot of attention.

And it has. Look at the press we’ve given them. This is undoubtedly the first time we’ve ever devoted this space to Dooie Stevens. With any luck, it’ll also be the last–can they ever possibly top the outrageousness of this latest contest?